Review: American Dreamz

“American Dreamz”
Run time: 1:47

I can only imagine the pitch from Paul Weitz, whose credits include “About A Boy”, “American Pie”, “In Good Company” and “The Klumps”. I’m purely speculating but I would imagine it went something like this:

“Ok, everybody loves American Idol, right? What if Simon Cowell was the only judge and he hated his job?”

“My wife loves that grey haired guy” the studio head interjects.

“Well, this version is called American Dreamz and it’s judged by the cynical Brit, Martin Tweed. I worked with Hugh Grant on “About A Boy”, he’ll do it.”

“He’s very charming…” the studio head begins, but is quickly cut off by Weitz.

“Now we find the next big star from middle America, but she’s a real backstabbing, win-at-all-costs trollop. I loved Mandy Moore in “How To Deal” and “Chasing Liberty”. She has spunk, let’s get her. To make it fun, let’s say an Al-Queda operative living with his cousins in L.A. accidently gets picked for the show by the kid that kept saying milf in “American Pie”, I know him, too.”

“The Al-Queda guy?” the studio head asks.

“No,” a frustrated Weitz replies, realizing the studio head has no real vision or creativity, “the American Dreamz producer, but follow me here, because this is where it makes it’s ever important, to me at least, social commentary — what if the President was simply a puppet of his Chief of Staff and, after getting re-elected and going into seclusion for weeks, is persuaded to be a guest judge on the final episode of American Dreamz? Dennis Quaid did “In Good Company” and Willam Defoe owes me a favor so done and done.”

“Can you get Carmen Electra to make a cameo?” the studio head chimes in.

“Sure, sure, but here’s where we tie it all in. Mandy Moore’s boyfriend joins the Army after she dumps him, he goes to Iraq blah, blah, blah, comes home a war hero. Her agent seizes the opportunity for good press and she takes him back. Chris Klein did the “American Pie” movies for me. He’s a good kid and with all this Katie Holmes stuff, he could use the distraction.”

“He really took it on the chin in the whole TomKat deal..” the studio head offers.

“ANYWAY, I don’t want to spoil anything, but the gist is the Al-Queda op makes it to the finals against Mandy Moore with the President in prime striking distance. You can piece together what happens from here, right?” an exhausted Weitz asks after birthing his latest opus.

“You’ll get Carmen Electra for sure, right?” poses the studio head, giving Weitz the thumbs up.

Or I could be way off, but the movie poster does says this: Imagine a country where the President never reads the newspaper, where the government goes to war for all the wrong reasons, and more people vote for a pop idol than their next President.”

Far fetched. Very un-PC. Biting and outspoken. My kind of movie.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 (only because the drunk 40 something “gals” behind us at the Studio Movie Grill last weekend would not shut up)

One comment

  1. Part of me wanted to see this film.

    But any time someone describes a film as “Here’s how the pitch must have gone”… I find myself deciding I really need to bask in the glow of the filmmaking.

    Studio exec jokes seem to never get old. Maybe cause so many of them are true. It’s like watching a Train full of elephants collide with a mini-van of midgets. Odd? Yes. Horrifying? Probably. But any time it happens you want to hear about it.

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